It's not that anything terrible happened, it's more the anxiety in the pit of my stomach, telling me something terrible is about to happen. I couldn't tell you what or how or why.
No matter what I've done or not done, I'll get up in the morning and go out into the world and do the best I can. Just as I do every day. Some days I get it right, some days not so much.
What I need to remember is the sun will come up tomorrow. It will shine on a brand new day. A day of possibilities, problems, joys and surprises. What has already happened cannot be changed. Tomorrow can be done better.
I've always felt pretty courageous. At least in the respect that I will keep moving in spite of my fear. Sometimes all one can do is take one more step. Sometimes, one doesn't even really know where to step, just take one forward.
I don't know if any of this makes a bit of sense, it's just how I'm feeling right now. Trying to ride the wave of life without manipulating it too much. Stop fighting the flow and just surf it out. Fantasizing the freedom to make mistakes, express my feelings and be okay.